When Kate Gunn, separated from and divorced her husband, Kristian she needed to unpick their joint lives, including arrangements for the family home and children. She has written a book about her experience and how to maintain an amicable relationship when emotions can be high.
Miss Gunn has provided what she believes are her five key tips to separating amicably, including considering the impact of the marriage breakdown on all parties, including your ex-partner, surrounding yourself with a positive support network and 'aiming for the middle'.
Two of the key tips that I often give to clients are also covered, 'play the long game' and 'write don't speak.' I often advise clients to confirm arrangements in writing, to ensure everybody is clear on the arrangements. It is also important to think of long term arrangements. Sometimes people can be so caught up in the short term results that they cannot see beyond that exact moment.
Miss Gunn provides some insightful tips and advice from somebody who has been through a divorce and come out of the other side.
It was hard to disentangle our lives when we had three kids, a house, friends, family, debts, savings, personal possessions, plus 10 years of shared memories, but we did it and remained friends. How was that possible? The secret was that those five years of untangling our lives weren’t just about the nuts and bolts of separation and divorce – they were about building up a new friendship, too. It may seem extreme to talk about friendship in the same breath as divorce but, while it wasn’t easy, by remaining friends, life is now so much better for all of us. Here are my five lessons for consciously uncoupling in the real world.